So... hung out with Jordan, yet again this evening. We had talked about me staying over... but... I dunno. I just... thought I shouldn't. Cuz. I dunno. So he drove me home at like 230. Now we're talking on msn.
He said he's falling in love with me.
And I can't help but feel the same thing is happening to me.
It's scary.
Abso-fuckin-lutely scary.
But I like it...? Heh.
I know he wants me. I read it. And... he's "willing" to wait til I'm comfortable...? WILLING? Geez. I hate that word. So much. To me it comes with like an automatic giant sigh. But whatever. That's really sweet. I know he'd never pressure me.
He said he's scared of me hurting him. He's scared of me hurting him? The man who's been with ... you know "lots" of women... and me been with... zero (men... or women for that matter...). Right... I dunno. I'm still somewhat paranoid that if I do sleep with him, he'll totally dump me. That freaks me out so much. I need to get over it.
I don't know what's going on. I don't know if I want him falling in love with me. Or me to fall in love with him, but it's clearly happening whether I want it to or not. And that's probably a good thing, cuz I'm sure if it were up to me solely, I'd never be with anyone. :P I hate rejection... or feeling... small and... like... I dunno. This is such a new, weird feeling. Caring for someone who actually... hmm... cares the same amount for me back... and likes kissing me. :P
Yeah. Time for bed, seeing as it's after 4 now... guh.
He said he's falling in love with me.
And I can't help but feel the same thing is happening to me.
It's scary.
Abso-fuckin-lutely scary.
But I like it...? Heh.
I know he wants me. I read it. And... he's "willing" to wait til I'm comfortable...? WILLING? Geez. I hate that word. So much. To me it comes with like an automatic giant sigh. But whatever. That's really sweet. I know he'd never pressure me.
He said he's scared of me hurting him. He's scared of me hurting him? The man who's been with ... you know "lots" of women... and me been with... zero (men... or women for that matter...). Right... I dunno. I'm still somewhat paranoid that if I do sleep with him, he'll totally dump me. That freaks me out so much. I need to get over it.
I don't know what's going on. I don't know if I want him falling in love with me. Or me to fall in love with him, but it's clearly happening whether I want it to or not. And that's probably a good thing, cuz I'm sure if it were up to me solely, I'd never be with anyone. :P I hate rejection... or feeling... small and... like... I dunno. This is such a new, weird feeling. Caring for someone who actually... hmm... cares the same amount for me back... and likes kissing me. :P
Yeah. Time for bed, seeing as it's after 4 now... guh.
posted by Katy at 1:40 AM
1 Comments:
wow, it is kinda cool to just sleep over and lay together without the you know what, lol.
Aw, dalling in love is soo awesome~!!
Wait until u sleep with him though~~
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